Archive for April 2008
Back To Our Future
Yeah, it’s me again, your faithful servant, here to elucidate my faithful readers as to what you should be thinking about the current events that inundate our senses as the 3rd rock spins madly through time and space.
As I sit in my Fortress of Fortitude here on the Ilse of Lucy contemplating the Yin and Yan of this , that, and the other, I am at once overwhelmed by the fact that Americans are wringing hands and gnashing teeth over the price of gasoline and yet underwhelmed at the lack of understanding shown by the same said people at the ramifications of our gluttonous use of oil. The US leads the world in fossil fuel consumption. With only 5% of the world’s population we use 25% of the fuels. While it is true that India and China are rapidly closing the usage gap with us, we have little or no control and leverage in that matter.
While the debate over ethanol’s cost effectiveness keeps the talking heads busy wagging their tongues and pointing their collective fingers, the fact that ethanol production literally takes food out of the mouths of the hungry is undeniable.
You may ask yourself “Oh Wazoo, what can we do about this? Can you show us a way to lower our gas expenditures without time consuming Government involvement? Can there be a way to use less ethanol and thereby increase the food available for those who have not?” Yes my children, there is such a two edged sword of economic feasibility and human compassion. TAKE YOUR FOOT OFF THE DAMN GAS PEDAL! A National speed limit of 55 mph is a minimal hardship in comparison to a continued economic slowdown and certainly pales in comparison to world wide hunger. It’s time for America to take the lead ,( as it has always done), and show why we are the greatest country in the world.
Update: Jacquie Lawson Cards
Good news. We’ve heard a response from Jameson with Jacquie Lawson’s regarding their new Teddy Bear card. To view the newer version of the Teddy Card.
Dear ,
Thank you for your message.
Thank you for your email about the Teddy and the Seagulls card. I’m really sorry that you saw this negatively – it was certainly not meant to be so. We put the American flag in there just as a sort of joke to show that poor Teddy had been blown so far off course that he was in US waters! It was never our intention to show that Teddy was being ignored by the big ships, but just that his little rowing boat was too small to be seen!
But thank you for warning us about this, and just in case others misunderstand our intentions in the same way, I’ll ask the artists to change the flag to another one.
However, if you would still like to receive a prorated refund for your membership fee, please respond to this e-mail indicating us to do so.
Best wishes,
Jameson
help@jacquielawson.com
They have indeed changed the American flag to a nondescript nautical flag. Thank you very much, Jacquie Lawson. I will be keeping my card account that I do enjoy sending out.
One of the email card purchases that I have used over the years has been English artist’s Jacquie Lawson’s website. It’s not a free site. And you would think that a card website would be apolitical when taking money from Americans, but I’ve cancelled my account due to the most recent card addition. It’s a Teddy Bear sail boat adventure that has Teddy floating out to sea and needing help. Good ol’ Jacquie has an American boat flying the Stars and Stripes completely passing Teddy without helping.
Being a British website, and Jacquie being English, shouldn’t that be an Union Jack flag on a boat in English waters? Why an American flag?
The only reason I can think of is another liberal’s sentimental way to slam democratic America for being the land of the free and the home of the brave.
Last Hangout of Witches Updating Image
Trying to update their image, a British school wants to stop using a broom-riding witch as their school symbol. The local villagers are not too pleased though with the idea of their history being eradicated.
Warboys is the last recorded place in England where witches were hanged.
Alice Samuels, in her late 70s, her husband John and her daughter Agnes were executed in 1593 after being accused by a 10-year-old girl, her four sisters and servants of causing them to have fits.
Everything Free? Sure I Want That!
When you offer free prescriptions and free hospital car parking, heck, who wouldn’t want to change countries?
An English village is so taken with the benefits of being Welsh, including free prescriptions and free hospital car parking, that it is holding a referendum on becoming part of Wales.
Residents of Audlem, Cheshire, nine miles from the Welsh border, have organised an online poll asking villagers whether it is time to break away from England.
Short of the biggest constitutional shake-up since the 1284 Statute of Rhuddlan made Monmouthshire part of Wales, the village is unlikely to come under the control of the Welsh Assembly any time soon.
The more socialistic a country is, the more people demand to have a part of it without the responsibilities.
Florida Politician Worries About Truck Nuts
Second generation Lake County politician Carey Baker (FL – R) has a lot on his mind lately with all of the important decisions that the Florida House of Representatives has to weigh in on but he’s got a mission. Banning bull testicle truck accessories from the back of trucks.
With the massive layoff of teachers and government services, due to Governor Crist’s policies, along with escalating property taxes, the GOP Representative finds bull testicles hanging down from redneck trucks offensive and is campaigning to ban them.
Yep you heard it, no bull.
Superstitious Display Doesn’t Allow For Resting In Peace
St. Padre Pio, recently canonized 20th century saint, has been put on display as cult-like worshippers pass by. Masquerading as a non-decomposing corpse, a wax mask has been placed over Padre Pio’s face to protect the more sensitive viewers from a non-disclosed vitiation.
A team of biochemists and other experts has worked since the exhumation to get the body into a fit state to be shown. Padre Pio’s face was covered with a lifelike silicone mask of the type used in wax museums.
This prompted a circle of Padre Pio devotees to ask last night for an autopsy to establish that the remains were authentic. Forensic scientists who took part in the exhumation and attended yesterday’s conference denied his face was badly decomposed. They said it had been decided to use the mask to protect the sensibilities of those who visited the crypt where the body is to go on show.
The Church should promote a healthier attitude of death and an eternal unseen soul than the macabre voyeurism of an improbable incorruptible mortal body.
15th St. Catherine of Bologna’s supposedly incorruptible body looks like an Egyptian mummy.
Snow Job
First Glenn Beck crosses over to the Dark Side, now Tony Snow? Snow, still battling cancer, and recently quitting the White House post as spokesperson, has now joined CNN.
Past Tony Snow posts:
Just Watch Me Die
How about an art show where you watch someone take their last breath? The irony? It’s by a German artist.
German artist Gregor Schneider wants you to die. But not just anywhere — he wants you to draw your last breath in an art gallery to make us less scared of the moment that awaits us all.
“Unfortunately today, death and the road to death are about suffering. Coming to terms with death as I plan it can take away the pain of dying for us,” the 39-year-old artist told the online edition of daily Die Welt.
“An artist can contribute something to this issue by building humane places for death where people can die with dignity.”
This final performance cannot be from just anyone, however. It has to be someone who has a lot of common with Schneider and who understands his intentions, he told the newspaper.
“The dying person would arrange everything beforehand. He will be the focus.
What a disgraceful act of disrespect for life. I wonder if this artist’s ancestor was a Nazi.
Cardinal Trujillo Dies
Cardinal Alfonso Trujillo, the controversial president of the Pontifical Council for the Family and the youngest archbishop to be ordained a cardinal passed away today. His stance on not allowing the use of condoms between couples where one spouse had HIV, because Trujillo incorrectly stated that condoms did not stop the spread of HIV, created an uproar and led to condemnation from the medical community throughout the world. Cardinal Trujillo was considered a papabile candidate in the 2005 papal elections.
Colombian Cardinal Alfonso Lopez Trujillo, president of the Pontifical Council for the Family, died of respiratory failure Saturday in Rome, Vatican sources told Efe. He was 73.
He passed away around 8:30 p.m. local time (1830 GMT) at the Pius XI Clinic in the Italian capital, where he had been hospitalized for a month.
With him at the time of his death were Cardinal Deacon Angelo Sodano, his brother and a nephew, as well as other relatives and members of the Roman Curia.
Freak Exchange Of Nature
Pelosi and Gingrich sitting in D.C.
K-I-S-S-I-N-G.
In one of the worst pairings in this election year, the hypocrisy of climate protection and change coming from Pelosi and Gingrich is stomach-wrenching. I couldn’t believe my eyes watching this black and white, water-wasting slick commercial on the couch with the Congress in the background.
Newt, what are you doing???? This is a conservative approach to pseudo-science misinformation? A better commercial for you, Newt, would have been an ad showcasing the recent finding of 200,000 acres of oil reserves in North and South Dakota, Wyoming, and Sasketchewan. You could have Nancy Pelosi sitting on your lap sipping oil through her recycled Congress cafeteria straws to show solidarity on our abundant natural resource supply.
What’s next Newt? Newt Gingrich and Jimmy Carter’s Middle East Peace Initiative?
Sma' Talk Wi' T 